Love

In a country like India, there are many things to be considered before you decide to fall in love.  This is absurd given love is natural feeling every living being experiences.

This perception distorts the way we handle relationships.  Usually one gives preference to career, to work over personal and family life.  On the contrary, they can coexist very well when we understand that love matures our understanding of how one person relates to other.

The maturity displaces notion of beauty, and body which we daily experience through images that run on media.  It also upholds literally the notion that love is blind.  It is blind because it connects each other with language of hearts.

Language of hearts is not a metaphor, it means speaking to human side of each other.  Acknowledging true emotions without the need for social approval.  It appreciates the other person for what they are and it excites both to be genuinely interested in each other.

Genuine interest fights to overcome differences, find commonalities, and seek to improve position of each other.  Such personal development is basis for developing into a mature adult, and bring up caring family.

Family is really a tricky concept.  They are the ones who usually oppose love yet all but embody love.  This is because that each family can be seen as string of relationships with some definite expectations.  This expectations is what causes mental block, and hinders family from realising love of one for new member.

The entry of new member is thus faced with opposition and naturally so.  It is thus important to be open in relationships.  Being open upholds fundamental value of being truthful which is basis of trust.  Trust is what builds relations and relations is what defines family.

Love, family are two experiences which every one experiences.  Yet some fail to acknowledge their role.  The insight provided here seeks to serve two purposes- to love and be loved.  Hope it makes it clear what it means to fall in love

The day my world tumbled

A natural disaster is a close example to explain nature of change that one experiences, rightly calling it a tumbled situation. In case of a disaster, it is the loss of near and dear, material belongings that cause us loose sense of sanity.  The jumping of people off world trade centre during 9/11 is another such example.

'My world' herein means our constructed world, so when i say 'my world tumbled', i hint at falling apart of our constructed worlds (in our minds).  To make it clear, the meaning is, that we carry a way of looking at the world, with age it emboldens, and we try fitting everything in that narrow tunnel of understanding of ours.  When that narrow tunnel of ours collapses, everything that is built on it, collapses with it.

Just imagine, all your goals, ideas, thoughts, emotions as having their roots in that singular view of yours, and a day comes, when you realize that it does not stand test of scrutiny.  Imagine, what you would be as a person the very next moment.

What does such a situation mean? My experience tells me that you have the feeling of numbness, where you detach yourself from the daily 'you', and in a moment every cherished moments you had before, passes like a whiz, you can by yourself see, how like pawns on chessboard, things fall apart.  Then there is silence, and then realization.

Why would I like to share such private and incomprehensible situation with you? Because I learnt a lesson.

After that moment, you are no longer you.  The realization that you no longer are you has filled in me many voids, about my own understanding, about my understanding about the surroundings.

I believe, even though, i did not say to you, what that moment was? what were my realizations?  It does not matter, as they again have come from my own tunnel, may be little bigger this time, than the previous one.

But for you, it means, if i may be allowed, there are many tunnels through which we experience. None of it higher/lower, right/wrong, good/bad.  I guess this is what, seers what us to know, to rise above differences...

Business

The terms business, MBA, entrepreneurship, self-employment have recently gained prominence to be buzzwords among youth and government alike.

I was wondering what could be motivations to set up a business, take that extra risk, pool in capital and talent.

Also why is MBA of such importance especially in India, is it because of lucrative career, or do people really learn to run a business.  After consultations I believe it is because of lucrative career and the connections/network that one develops and which are indeed important to fast forward in business.

The other buzzword that elicits lot of positivity is entrepreneurship, setting up a company or creating new opportunity.  India today boasts one of largest network of start ups but very few are recognizable. Many of the young have seen attitudinal shift from being job seekers to job creators which is good for any country's progress but the shift needs to be evaluated for the reasons which are unclear.

Going through these correlated domains and activity I pause to wonder whether money is the sole driving force.  I see ads of companies which claim to create meaning in people's lives through their product or service but never have done.  For example- flipkart may have started in first place to provide easy way to get books but I wonder what strategies made them cook big billion day sale fiasco run on basis predatory pricing.  Here's one more instance...you might have come across newspaper reports of companies reporting 30-40% increase in their quarterly profits which propel stock market speculations to turn bullish.  This makes one wonder if profit is sole motive of businessmen and their investors. Reading about ethics of government organization to that of private organization, major delineating factor happens to be that govt organization's purpose is to serve public whereas for private companies its profit.  Can they both go together? This is where concept of sustainable businesses kicks in- example tata's jamshedpur township model.

Why all this???

There are lot many considering to start up business or pursue their ideas and convert them into reality.  But the intent/motivation is either unclear or inadequate this reflects in cyclical upswings in pursuing their stated goals.  Such efforts may aid in starting up a company but definitely not in running it through turbulent waters.  To clear the ripples here's a perspective...

I being away from home for long was observing the climate at home and how our small chit business was progressing.  I observed that the climate was dull as there was no support to mother who looks after the home & business with myself and dad away from home for different reasons.  The case was same with business, with number of subscribers falling and thus income from the same.  I shared my concern with mother as I always wanted business to grow purely for monetary reasons...

Mother reflected saying that business is not about money it is about development, and money is just a part of it, the intent to expand business is good but it is not at the risk of loosing the intention with which business was started in first place i.e. develop.

Money was previously one of the major factors that influenced my decisions, but hearing the real intent of business for mom, my wishful thinking of expanding business overnight stopped.  My thoughts are more meaningful now when it comes to think of businesses/organizations or its administration.

Hope its the same for you too...

Conflicting Personalities

"Conflicting themes in a personality" would have been apt title for this article but I preferred otherwise to highlight the differences a person projects with his dual characteristics which are starkly anti and yet resemble a personality.

Did you meet a person who holds great patience but works in a hurry?
Did you find any person who deals with people effectively yet lack empathy?
Are any of your friends highly ambitious and yet fearful of small failures?

I believe with the diversity we have it is certain that you might have come across one... Now, the question is why do such conflicting themes exist or develop in an  individual?

Psychology offers an explanation in the form of Stockholm syndrome where in captive in due amount of time starts liking captor. Studies by developmental psychologists suggest an explanation... that children of authoritarian parents (Google for authoritative parents too) come to a conclusion that use of violence and extreme control are methods to control surroundings and so when they grow up they tend to behave in a manner which they resisted in their early years.

So, you would find

*A person who speaks little, to be over emotional
*A person who speaks a lot, to be rational

Hence going by present perceptions which mostly are driven by "cult" of westernization it is the second variety of persons that are mostly preferred. Exams you give measure your objective/rational outlook and they cannot dwell into your emotional being. Hence such exams cannot really predict what you are capable of but the exams still are being practiced.

So, when our foundations (education, family, peer group) are weak we tend to overlook the difficulties... In the same way, existence of opposites as a natural thing is being overlooked.
Such existence can be within an individual, within a society, and also within universe(matter & antimatter).

These understanding can help us explain...

*Why 98% of women who get raped around globe are by person they already know
*Why a highly creative person like Einstein sometimes acted foolish
*Why the intelligent are least trustworthy
*Why the rich exploit the poor

Conviviality of opposites is being recognized now widely which is evident when America spoke of safeguarding Ukraine's territorial integrity however, which itself erred when invading Afghanistan.

If you have any such conflicting personalities in you I suggest you to accept it as it is... Then it will not be conflicting anymore.

Small life

Hmmn… it’s been a year I turned sadhu baba preaching you all the little things I have learnt…

Some irrelevant… some without lessons… some profound…

When I asked some of my friends about… whether they read my blog???

They said “Ya, dude I’m reading it all…. The articles have been improving and guess you are a pro now…”

After hearing such soothing comments… I wanted to know what he liked…

After I heard the answer, I got to know that he read it may be some 4 months back  but not followed it thereafter…

I don’t think it’s his fault and not rather mine… It’s how we perceive… that counts…. Nothing else…

Let’s see how we perceive with an example…

There is ditch in front of you… and you are driving your bike towards it. What would you do???

A)     Apply brake, so that ditch does not make you ditch

B)      Drive faster, so that you jump over the ditch

C)      Look for escape from ditch, skimming adjacent to it

D)     Get ready to feel the thud

If you are choosing option A, you are normal, responsible

If you choose option B, you are adventurous, irresponsible

If you choose option C, you are optimist, silent killer

If you choose option D, you are obedient, honest, confused

If you have other answer… you are logical, coward…

Most of us are messed up with this small life… then is it necessary to discuss on how to drive bike over ditch??? Hmnn… I say, YES

There are no big things in life… small actions produce big impact… The above example tells u d same…

One more example, I was asked, what love is?

I asked her back… “What do you think?” she replied “I think love is something which makes you die for one another”

Nice, it’s really a great bond which can make you die for other and make your life terrible without the other….

I replied…. “Sometime back my view was an equation”

Love=friendship+sex

Now, love is just love!!! The + symbol in above equation is love…

Again, I’m preaching right??? It’s the easiest thing… there are many who preach but to follow is tough job, leadership is easy than following, being self is important than being professional, what you know is important than what you don’t know…. I guess I make some sense or is it still non-sense...???

Comment

"Sorry mumbai you aren't better than mumbai"

Note: Read above article before continuing

The below article... sorry probably a comment to one of guest articles onlifezlesson.in "Sorry mumbai you aren't better than mumbai" .... Hmnn.. I seriously did not expect such a lengthy comment... thanks to sen... for such informative comment... nicely written... $#it happens.... 

Well, the 2 cities cannot be compared. Delhi cannot be Indias Financial hub (as it simply cannot rival Mumbais muscle power in terms of money & trade) while Mumbai cannot be Delhi (Cos political capitals have to be a show peice, which Mumbai isnt). There are few cities globally who are financial & commercial hub (eg - Tokyo, London etc) otherwise Financial hub generally are a neglected lot over political hub rivals(be it Newyork vs Washington, Karachi Vs Islamabad, Indore over Bhopal). There are few smart govts who have made even their financial hubs a show peice (eg Shanghai in China). Yes we need a great political capital but the country cannot progress w/o a strong finacial hub. Mumbai may still be numro uno but clearly is crumbling ..we must remember that if Mumbai crumbles, our aims of being an economic super power will be slowed. No city can match Mumbai in terms of being a melting pot of so many things. Yes we seen a lot of stuff coming up at Delhi (airport, roads, boulevards, metros etc) but clearly it is still a controlled economy (for political reason). Some of the best construction happens not within the perimeter of Delhi but in neighbouring Gurgaon or Noida. Most of the companies are located in Gurgaon, as a result white collared workforce in Delhi travel to Gurgaon for work. Some of the best malls are in Gurgaon or Noida. Some of the best construction projects happens in Gurgaon or Noida. This is not with Mumbai ..Mumbai houses everything within city limits. Be it best of clubs, bars, restaurants, contruction projects, corporates! ..and yes even the night life. It is these parameters that makes Mumbai a magnet over its neighbouring cities, making people to come to work or enjoy nightlife. I always say that Delhi is a city built by the govt of India, while Mumbai is a city built by the people of India. We need a global financial centre to realise our dream of an ecnomic super power and Mumbai is the only Indian city to make it happen. Negligence of it will cost us deeply.

Sorry sen, if  i did not acknowledge you about this... but i could not stop sharing it..... will drop you mail for dis ;)

Services Vs Industry

India’s service sector is growing at rate of 34% (23 from IT and 11 % from rest) andindustry at around 10-14%

Why?

1)      We would give 30 Rs tip to waiter(for his service with smile) rather than 1 rupee to beggar(not all)

2)      One prefers DELL to many for the  service it offers on a single call to customer care

Now, providing a service is not an easy thing, one has to smile at every fool... and understand needs of client to serve him and smile at him even though he scolds you or simply f**k u…

Smiling is easy, we get it naturally by looking at kids but a false smile is difficult toserve

The very logical thing why service industry is growing at pace is…. It is need of the hour… and we too get paid well… party well…

But then… if everything’s fine why services not a dream job for any one???

Coz…

“You are stick to serve… never get served”

Now, let’s look into industry… an industry is a place where people form a team not just to understand process but also people around which I guess is required…

Advantages:

1)      Meet people

2)      Work your a** out instead sitting in front of computer

What do the above advantages point to…?

“This guy is from industry for sure”

Yea, im from industry… but I had been to services… too..

Let me share the insights of industry which none would have ever shared with you….

1)      With people involves politics… better be careful with it

2)      With people there is corruption

3)      With people there is ego

4)      With people there is hatred

5)      With people there are responsibilities

6)      With people there is delay

7)      With people there are errors

But, isn’t it skeptical to just conclude saying now that services is better than industry… or viceversa…

Both have their places…. For beginner its industry that makes him mature… and maturity (expert) delivers better service….

Now, lets us explore the two dimensions together... why can't we have place where in

industry looks into service and

service into industry...

This is the emerging area... where the customer not only needs the best at best price... also he needs it with good service... 

So, Industries co-relate with services to excel....

Tata group, Wipro stands as example for it....

Google, Microsoft also falls into same category....